We in the Manosphere want to marry virgins. Isn’t this old-fashioned? Absolutely. But it’s generally the best thing for women’s physical and emotional health. It’s also the best to make sure she will be loyal and devoted to you in marriage.
A range of posts about female virginity below:
1. Krauser’s site: “The more dicks a woman has been banged by, the less likely she’ll be satisfied by any particular one. As the number of he-rockets ravaging her she-pocket increases, her ability to bond with a man is accordingly decreased…. Why ancient truths have to be relearned by modern morons is beyond me.” – Ferdinand Bardamu
“I will participate in a traditional wedding when the bride can participate in a traditional honeymoon. I will walk down the aisle and sign my life away in a traditional wedding the day I can kick open the door to a honeymoon suite and make love to a virgin. I demand my traditional wedding be followed by a traditional honeymoon. Otherwise, my extraordinary ego prohibits me from committing to a bunch of other men’s leftovers.” – The Better Beta
2. Heartiste examines data that proves virgins makes the best wives, and that women with more sexual partners are more likely to fail at marriage:
as soon as a woman has had more than one partner her long term marital stability risk drops to near 50%… It is only women who have more than one intimate premarital relationship who have an elevated risk of marital disruption.
Women who have had 0 lifetime non-martial sexual partners have a stable marriage of over 80%.
Women who have had 1 lifetime non-martial sexual partner have a stable marriage of 53%.
Women who have had 2 lifetime non-martial sexual partners have a stable marriage of 43%.
Women who have had 3 lifetime non-martial sexual partners have a stable marriage of 39%.
Women who have had 5 lifetime non-martial sexual partners have a stable marriage rate of 29%.
3. Victor Pride says that in choosing a wife: She must be a “good” girl: She cannot be a drinker or a smoker or have any tattoos. She cannot have a party girl past, a sordid past, and she cannot have gone out more than a couple times drinking. You cannot turn a whore into a housewife. The more sexual partners she has had the more likely the marriage will end in divorce. Are you saying all party girls, smokers and drinkers are sluts? Yes.
The fewer sexual partners your wife has had, the better. The ideal wife should be a virgin. Remember: The more sexual partners she has had the more likely you are to be divorced in about 6 years and lose most of your money, possessions, and your children. If you think she needs help or that you are helping her and she is changing then you are being foolish and you are being played. It’s going to end badly for you when you get hitched to a woman like this. Always pick a good girl. That means a virgin (or close), family oriented, pleasant, eager to help, a smiler, and patient.
4. Heartiste explains why virginity is so important. If she’s not a virgin, she won’t bond as strongly from the sex act. A woman who has been around the block will find nothing spectacular about the next in line cock. (Slam poetry!) Virgins will bond like Krazy Glue to the first man who deflowers them. The love will be so strong that she will look up to him as a king, and Eat, Pray, Love boredom killing journeys of tingle-actualization will never even enter her consciousness.
5. This article outlines how many virgins are in the United States with some interesting facts: Women who are college graduates are more likely to be virgins. So, it’s not just Ivy Leaguers who are more sexually restrained, but all college graduates… Female college graduates are 5.4 times more likely to be virgins than those who never received that diploma. 1.1 million Americans between the ages of 25 and 40 are still virgins.
George: My take… the highest quality girls will have degrees AND are virgins. And they exist. Go marry one gentleman and be exceedingly devoted to her for the rest of your days, grateful for the person she kept herself prior to marrying you.
6. Alpha Game discusses an article which outlines why some women aren’t able to get married: Hooking up with some guy in a hot tub on a rooftop is fine for the ladies of Jersey Shore — but they’re not trying to get married. You are. Which means, unfortunately, that if you’re having sex outside committed relationships, you will have to stop. Why? Because past a certain age, casual sex is like recreational heroin — it doesn’t stay recreational for long.
Men love sluts… but they don’t want to marry women who have had sex with too many other men… the bigger problem with sluttiness is that it renders a woman significantly less marriageable in male eyes. This doesn’t mean that a known or perceived slut won’t eventually get married, but she’ll usually marry a lower quality, lower rank man than she could otherwise have obtained.
7. Krauser puts forward a good reason for a woman to be a virgin until she’s married: Put simply, “good girls” who follow a healthy lifestyle and identify with the feminine last longer than “bad girls” who chart a path through hedonistic waters. The following bad habits ravage a girl’s radiance…
Excessive cock-hopping. Sex in itself adds to a woman’s glow but sex with different men detracts from it. A woman who gets herself fucked 500 times by one guy she loves will look good. If the same woman spreads those fucks across 30 guys she will look like shit.
3MM: Not all is lost if you have been having sex. Just STOP DOING IT and realise that men won’t take you seriously if you throw yourself into bed with them so quickly.
The first survey was good, this is even better. Excellent.
Thanks Poet. One more link that I came across after posting the above: http://socialpathology.blogspot.com.au/2012/03/promiscuity-data-guest-post.html
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Great summary.
I’m a female virgin. If a guy was a whore prior to marriage I want no parts of him either. So men should also be prepared to come to the honeymoon with their purity in tact.
I am tired of hearing men lie to themselves about what we (virgins) want. No, we do not want a man that is overly sexually experienced any more than you want a woman who is. You think we would wait 23+ years to give our virginity to a man who didn’t value himself and didn’t care enough to give his penis to any woman who would let him? No way. If he didn’t care about all those other vaginas, this is just another one to him. Let him find a female whore to settle down with, that’s the way it normally happens and that’s the way it should be.
I completely support you Pink. I found this article really good from that point of view: http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/09/14/staying-celibate-before-marriage-was-best-thing-ive-ever-done/?fb_action_ids=4554957951415&fb_action_types=og.likes&fb_source=other_multiline&action_object_map=%7B%224554957951415%22%3A419195821476212%7D&action_type_map=%7B%224554957951415%22%3A%22og.likes%22%7D&action_ref_map
He wasn’t a virgin when he married, (he admitted it when asked in his facebook status) but he was celibate for 6 years prior to getting married after he became a Christian.
I don’t have a specific rule about how many women a man could have slept with and still be acceptable to me, and I don’t require him to be a virgin nor will i give him “extra points” for being one (neither would I think worse of him for being one). However, the men who go out to bars to pick up chicks and think that one night stands are the norm or a desirable experience are clearly damaged. A guy who can see sex with another human being as a form of masturbation is bound to be a low quality man, insecure and not worth my love and care.
Minor point: Since I was a virgin until 27 or so, I can relate; but at a certain point, one realizes the taboo is just a big deal. For a man.
I do not condone those who go looking for one-night stands (Male or female), and if he “didn’t care enough to give his penis to any woman who would let him”, well – yeah, damaged goods, I’ll concede.
But perhaps you’re being a little too harsh to those who can count partners on one hand and still have fingers left, and who have been in LTRs each time.
I also have to say, sex WAS a lot more fun when I didn’t really KNOW what to do – it was a mess, but it was exploration, fun, a game – created a bond, and lead to intimacy. I think that was “by design”.
Too soon old, too late wise. 
It’s all well and good to read this on the internet, but I’m not sure that reality is quite like you portray it. I hope so, but I don’t think so.
You see, I’m a virgin. I’m a woman in my mid twenties, college educated, not religious, went to school out of state, not fat, have traveled extensively and get asked out fairly often. Oh, and i am very interested in sex, open to different acts and have quite a sex drive; just learned to take care of it in other ways. The reason I’m a virgin is that to me sex equals to love and true intimacy. As it is, I haven’t been in love yet. It’s not a matter of rules and morals, but just a natural response. I tried going out to drink and didn’t enjoy the experience. It was boring and tedious. Ditto going to a club. Having moved around a lot- earning a master’s abroad, teaching English in Asia and following employment opportunities around The States, I just haven’t been in any one place long enough to build a social base that would allow me to be comfortable enough to engage with a man seriously. I’ve gone to rock festivals, back packed through Europe and gone kayaking in the wilderness, but going home with a man or taking a man home seems incredibly dangerous when I don’t know him all that well and don’t have a social base that would vouch for him.
Anyway, I’ll go ahead and get to my point now that the lengthy introduction is over with. I feel plain weird being a virgin, almost compelled to lie about it. I’m finally settled in the city where I’d like to stay, among friends and a few family members near by, and I don’t know how to address this virginity thing now that I’m ready to find a man for a long term relationship. No one ever thought of me as a slut, but everyone also assumes I have some sexual experience. I come off as normal, so people assume I’ve led a normal life in all aspects. I don’t correct them because I keep hearing it mentioned how weird it is to be a virgin post college. Like a girl who’s a virgin at 25 must be asexual or she’s been molested as a kid, or has major emotional issues or something.
The thing is, I haven’t built it up in my head, don’t expect a scene from a romance novel (don’t read romance novels), and am not really saving myself for marriage, though it would be nice. I’m fine with my first time being awkward and i could laugh some embarrassing things off. Yet the reason I’m still a virgin still stands- sex can happen only within the frame of a relationship, with trust and mutual emotional investment. But I think that most nice, educated men my age (and older) wouldn’t want to get involved with a virgin because they assume there are issues somewhere in the mix. I’m almost considering buying a vibrator to break the hymen, making up a couple of past boyfriends and blaming my lack of technique on being out of the game for a long time. But I don’t like the prospect of lying to my own man, especially since I don’t have any other secrets.
38-year old male; virgin until 27, three LTRs; born/raised Catholic.
Don’t worry about the flak you’re getting – it’s BS. It’s meant to drag you down into the mire. To lessen YOUR value. And i’ll point out, you’re keeping it for the RIGHT reasons, even more than because of religious prohibitions: You decided. That’s not a common sort of strength. HOLD ON TO IT.
Men will respect and appreciate that strength, and that patience.
Also, lying to your man will be a deal-breaker. Automatically, it’s a defect in humans: She lied about (X), what else is she lying about? But our society doesn’t actually LIKE honestly, it likes the pretty lies. Like, she was the town bicycle in college, then went back home and married her high school sweetheart – and wore white down the aisle… (And divorced him 6 years later, too, but we won’t go down that path.)
Ask yourself if a man who had lied to you about something would be around much after you found out. If you can’t handle lies to you, don’t tell lies, either.
Also, for sake of comparison – and I’ll leave out a LOT of detail – I had two LTRs which were decent (and LTR = a year or longer). I’m in a third one, where – after 6 years – I’ve found out she’s a “reformed slut”. She is not reformed, she is aggressive, she is insulting, she is demeaning, and she is never satisfied. I’d been thinking it was me, until she told a friend the truth about who she was…
The other two LTRs? We were thinking marriage, and that had been our intent going in.
It is this last LTR that has soured me and made me cynical. Every woman I look at now, is just an extension of this black hole that sucks in my time, energy, money, and life.
DO NOT become that woman. But be aware, giving “it” up for the wrong reasons will quickly turn you into her.
I know this is late, but I’m in the exact same situation. The exact same situation. I’ve had opportunities to lose my virginity in the past, but it was never right. And by right, I mean it wasn’t something I knew I’d be able to respect myself for doing in the morning. The hard part now is trying to find a guy, and I almost feel like I screwed up somewhere along the way for not finding somebody sooner. I’ll be 27 in the spring, and while I’m looking forward to a move I’ve got planned and a fresh start in a new city, it scares me, too. For the same reasons – what man wants a 27 year old virgin? I don’t want cherubs coming down from the heavens or anything stupid like that for my first time – I just want to be able to look my future husband in the eye and tell him I saved it for him.
It sucks, I completely understand that. Like my mom keeps telling me, every time I’m home for the holidays and crying on her shoulder about it, it shouldn’t be something that a woman’s made to feel ashamed of. It speaks volumes about our society that we don’t even let girls have the option of waiting anymore. It’s sick.
I think you women are brilliant and strong for waiting. “I just want to be able to look my future husband in the eye and tell him I saved it for him.” Good on you, that’s fantastic. Stick to it.
As Jean said: “Men will respect and appreciate that strength, and that patience.” They’ll never disrespect you for waiting. We LOVE it.
Cynthia, Jelly Bean, you both are a lot higher value than you realize. What man wants a 27 yr old virgin? Me.
As the great Mentu said once:
1- Hey man, that beer looks pretty good.
2- No problem man, there some in the fridge.
1- Actually, I don’t like my beer too cold. And I think the backwash adds character> Could I have yours?
2- No man, that’s sick!
1- You’re just insecure!
Good to see such responses / and positivity on this subject
It seems we get a lot of things the wrong way around. The old ways are there for a reason – they’ve been tested and found to work for the lifestyle that promotes the old ways – and typically one that involves children and a stable marriage.
Some of us are cleaning up because so many have gotten things the wrong way around – if you want sex with different partners and no kids, that life is now available and practically considered acceptable. Call it ‘fucking about’ – don’t be offended, It’s just honest and sounds funny.
But those who want to build a life-long partnership that involves dedication, children, etc. Then the results above really do speak for themselves. It’s is a little scary to see just how strong an affect this has.
If you ‘fuck about’ your lifestyle starts to become narrowed to ‘fucking about’ even if you do try to get a LTR going ‘until death do you part’.
TV, peer pressure, hormones, alcohol, etc are all tempting us to ‘get things the wrong way around’ and fuck about.
Languages that allow for ambiguity have a way of dangling the truth before us. I really want to write a blog post on this one day.
3MM, I followed the link you left on Haley’s Halo and this is a hell of an article.
When I’m asked why I’m not married or why I’m not sexually active I often laugh and say that I wait and persevere because it amuses me to do so, but in reality, everything in your post applies to me and if that puts me behind in the eyes of world, then so be it. It amuses me when I’m told I’m not “doing it right” or “missing out” because the truth is I am doing it right and I’m not missing out and that brings joy to my life. And I can’t help but laugh because life itself is amusing.
Cheers Frank, thanks for the comment and feedback!
Please view this comment with an open mind, it’s nothing personal:
I am a drinker, a smoker and a party goer and guess what, I’m NOT a slut. And how dare you assume I am one. I have had sex with only one man and we are in a very committed relationship and plan on getting married. We go out and have fun together. We are best friends and love each other dearly. Just because I drink sometimes, smoke and go out, I am NOT unfit as a potential wife, as I plan on being a faithful and loving mother and partner. So, because I like to enjoy myself, do you condemn my future marriage? Is that not a bit unfair?
Quite frankly, Victor Pride’s article made me sick. Are women simply objects made for the benefit of men? Are we not human beings who deserve our own happiness and to make our own choices? Should men not respect their wives as much as their wives respect them?
What is your goal in life? Self gain? That’s what it seems like, and if it is so, you will die alone and unhappy. Try to focus more on how you can contribute to a relationship, instead of what you can achieve from it. When two people will do anything to make the other happy, will give as much as they can to maintain a strong loving relationship, that is the way towards a successful marriage, not your strict, theoretical rules and regulations and plans on how to get as much out of a marriage as YOU can.
Seriously, stop acting as if you know it all and start thinking about what you can still learn.
I wonder if any men in the developed world who think like this are married… I’d rather stay single than have one of them dragging me down.
I totally agree with most of the things that you say in this post; I think anyone man or woman will be more fulfilled with one sexual partner and that it is much better to wait, however I think it completely unfair to label all girls who drink and smoke as sluts! I have only ever been with one guy and was in a committed relationship for seven years, we separated due to him being violent last year and I have still not gone further than kissing another man. I would not by any means think of myself as a slut and yet I do smoke and I drink alcohol; I enjoy it and manage to control my urges so I can’t see an issue with it.
I can understand your point that this behavior may make a woman less attractive to some males, but on the other hand I know plenty of men who like the fact that I am fun, and think for myself and go out drinking, and I would not want to marry a man who wasn’t happy with me being myself and who I felt I had to change my behavior for. Drink definitely makes it harder to supress your sexual desire but not impossible so in my opinion labelling anyone who drinks as a slut is completely over the top.
Well I must be the very rare exception to the rule. Still together after 38 years.
“But perhaps you’re being a little too harsh to those who can count partners on one hand and still have fingers left, and who have been in LTRs each time. ”
Ran out of fingers AND toes long before I met the woman I’m still with 38 years later. And I let her know about it up front. It seemed to improve the attraction.
The attraction has to be there of course but ultimately love is an act of will. Hormones and attraction only get you so far.
As far as I can tell all the old rules were/are for betas. Nothing wrong with that. But to act as if they are universal truths rather than general truths is to make a fairy tale out of reality. I have made a life long practice of violating the “rules” and making it work. Will is the key. My experience is betas don’t have any.
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Ok- I had no patience to read through all of the comments but first of all- how the hell do tattoos indicate a woman’s level of sexual experience. I have three tattoos- what does that make me? Second- stop punishing women for having a sexual life. Part of being a human is being sexual. Most men are sexual long before marriage and are sexual with more than one partner. Why should it be any different for women? Third, the survey that says women who have had more than 5 partners have a 29% chance of keeping a marriage together is ridiculous. Why does it not take in to account lifestyle, background, and the man they are with. Finally, what feels right to a woman is completely up to her. Why the hell are any of you qualified to judge what a woman does with her body? If this is how men think, then sign me up for never getting married.
because the mother/wife is the foundation on which the HOME is built